Case File: Episode 15 - The Catastrophic Slide and Mass Casualties
Episode 15 of operations at Goob Lagoon marked a new low in managerial negligence. The introduction of a dangerously defective waterslide led to multiple patron fatalities, while the park simultaneously descended into chaos with mass drownings, rampant vandalism, and managerial misconduct.
Official Park Security Footage
By the Numbers: A Statistical Breakdown
100
Total Guests
75%
Satisfaction Rate
5
Fatalities
6
Near-Drownings
20
Sanitation Issues
52
Injuries & Slips
Chronology of Chaos
The Un-Contained Containment Slide
A newly installed green and yellow waterslide was opened to the public despite a clear and immediate design flaw. The attraction consistently failed to contain patrons, launching them at high velocity over the park's perimeter walls. This resulted in at least five (5) confirmed fatalities. Management's reaction was not to close the ride, but to express shock and morbid curiosity.
"He never came around! Did he die!?" - Park Manager CaseOh
Systemic Drowning and Managerial Paralysis
The park's aquatic safety protocols failed completely when multiple patrons began drowning simultaneously. At one point, three individuals were in distress in separate pools. The manager was audibly overwhelmed, unable to respond effectively, and demonstrated a critical lack of emergency training. His delayed, panicked reactions contributed directly to the severity of these life-threatening situations.
"Oh my god, there's two people drowning! We have three people drowning!" - Park Manager CaseOh
Endorsement of Vandalism and Assault
The facility suffered from repeated acts of vandalism, with graffiti appearing on multiple surfaces. Upon discovering the tags, the manager expressed amusement rather than taking action to remove them. In one instance, after locating a vandal, the manager chose not to involve security and instead administered vigilante justice by physically assaulting the individual, pushing them and causing injury.
"Gahook! Yo, that's gonna stay." - Park Manager CaseOh